"I'll follow with my eyes and never confess to you."
"I would anything you wanted asked of me, but never appear willing."
"I can love you more than anyone else you've dated before, because I know your personality inside out and you're the only person I can talk to."
She really wants to hit herself for believing they could ever be together, even for a second. It's not the racial problem. It's not a problem of class. Compatibility isn't the problem either.
The problem is the first move. The words no one is willing to speak.
She really wants to forget herself in a hopeful fantasy where she can "the one" he chases after, "the girl" he would do anything for.
She really wants to be herself around him, but there's a wall she built a long time ago to protect her heart. It's too strong. There are small dust fragments that crumbles in front of him, but his not really capable of understanding her pain and her trauma. He sees the world in black and white. He's against superficial appearances, false words, broken promises, ill-intentioned actions; everything which she has frequently done in her mis-guided journey. And he's simple enough that he'll never ask how her became so closed off. Yet, he's the closest person to her at the moment.
Their perspectives are so different it's like they're not apart of the same world. But the lack of attachment allows her to say anything in front of him, because he wouldn't repeat it. The reason being his kindness and loving nature, or the certain indifference of his friends, she wouldn't know.
She really wants to wake herself up from this unrealistic nightmare. She rarely speaks to him in person, so the only interaction they really have in social media.
"Maybe I'm just an entertaining way to pass the time."
"Why won't you reply?!?"
"It's okay. I know you're busy. I'll wait for you to come back."
She really wants to move away from the feelings of suffocation. Unrequited love isn't happiness, right?
"I don't write your name down, because you deserve your privacy and I demand my secrecy."
"I don't write your name down, cuz every time I see your name my heart beats a little faster."
